Creating Your New Habit-HAT! - the House of Authentic Thriving!

Jun 9 / Kat Linquist

Welcome to the next part of becoming an Authentic Architect! 

In the last blog I mentioned how you have been living in the House of Adoption Trauma (HAT). 

This HAT was handed to you, and is one that has been “running your life”  or some might say “ruining your life” with or without your conscious knowledge. 

I know this isn’t the House you want to be living in…

It’s a House built on Pain, Separation, and Trauma…  And it’s time to LET GO of this House and create something New…

Because you Deserve to live in Peace, Love, and Alignment!

So, are you ready to create a New Habit-HAT?  

YES?  So, let’s begin.

And if not quite ready, keep reading so you can get ready!

I want you to know that while this may seem challenging in the beginning, I know you can do this, even though TRUSTING Yourself may not come “naturally”.

First,  make the decision to leave the old Habit of Adoption Trauma behind you.  Most things you want to change start with making a Decision.  Take this as your First “Baby Step”. 

Now, I can already hear some of you saying, “But Kat… leaving Adoption Trauma behind me isn’t that easy… it’s TRAUMA!  You can’t just turn it off…”

I know this is how it feels... However...

What I am asking you to do is to Make a DECISION that you are ready to create a New Habit. 

to create the Habit of living in Your House of Authentically Thriving…

to Create a New Habit-HAT!

Once you make that Decision, the next step is to apply the formula:
Focus + Energy = Reality
.  This becomes your foundational behavior.

Your Focus and Energy are what you have control over. 

Make the decision to use your Focus and Energy to Move Out of your Current HAT. Keep practicing and applying your Focus and Energy to the best of your ability every day.

At first, you will see small increments, and then bigger growth over time.  You will shift from your Adoption Trauma into Authentically Thriving. 

When you stay Focused and apply your Energy to create the Reality you desire, these behaviors get easier and more automatic as you practice them.

If needed, go back and review the Blogs on Coming Out of the FOG and Emotional Mastery to further internalize and integrate the information to help you along your Journey.

The Blueprint for the House of Authentically Thriving

There are 3 Steps in the Blueprint to Create a House of Authentically Thriving! 

It’s best to build them in order, so you have a strong and stable structure to flourish in your life with Peace, Love, and Alignment.

1. Reframe Your Mind (Foundation of the House)

Your mindset is the foundation upon which everything else is built. 

Choose to develop a growth mindset, where you see challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, rather than argue for your limitations and self-doubt.

Reframing is also learning to LET GO of beliefs, patterns and habits which no longer serve you.   

When you Reframe your Adoption Trauma as “what happened inside you” based on the circumstances and experiences handed to you… you can take control of what is inside you and shift it. 

You cannot control what happened outside you.  Only what is inside you.

Building a solid foundation will support all other aspects of your development. 


2. Transform Your Heart (Structure of the House)

The structure of your house represents your Emotional Mastery and Well-being.  

Transforming your Heart involves letting go of the Adoption Pain so you can receive the Wisdom this life experience can offer you. 

This Letting Go opens your heart to new experiences, people, and emotions, allowing you to structure relationships which support  and nurture you.

Transformation of the Heart is about cultivating self-love, self-compassion, and a deep understanding of your emotional landscape. 

Check out all the May Blogs on Emotional Mastery and specifically understanding the Emotional Scale.

When you put your Focus and Energy on Self Love, you create a Reality of Self Love, and the ability to love others in a healthy and positive way, keeping yourself as your priority.


 3. Liberate Your Soul (Living in the House of Authentically Thriving)

Finally, Liberating your Soul means embracing your unique identity and living authentically as a Spiritual Being having a Human Experience. 

You get to live from a place of Peace, Love, and Alignment about who you choose to be and become, and the life you choose to create for yourself and those you love.

Living in the new HAT provides you the freedom to be your true self, and you create and choose who that true self is.

When you Liberate Your Soul, you live each day creating a life that reflects your passions, values, and aspirations. 

You are inspired in thoughts, feelings and actions to live every day to the best of your ability; being the best version of yourself in that moment.

These 3 Steps of the Blueprint provide you with the framework for Moving Beyond Adoption. 

While these steps can be undertaken on your own, for a more structured approach, keep connecting with this Blog series, and so you can be alerted when our upcoming free events and programs open up!

Next Few Blogs: Specific Challenges and Strategies

In the next few blog posts, I will delve into 6 specific challenges that adoptees face and provide strategies to reframe these traumas into triumphs.

Each post will offer practical advice and exercises to help you on your journey.

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