Coming out of the FOG creates incredible discord for many Adoptees. It is the time when the veil of ignorance and emotional protection lifts, and you are faced with the harsh realities of the deep pain, loss, and confusion that was suppressed for so long….
And now that you “see it”, you can’t “unsee it”, and it becomes all consuming and a huge disruption in your life. It brings that Energy more acutely to the surface.
You might also see other things changing in your life at the same time. It feels like your whole world is crashing down. Relationships might change, or end. Money becomes challenging, perhaps housing issues, car problems, health scares or diagnoses…
The Adoptee experience is a heavy burden… and one we didn’t consent to carrying. And now that you see more clearly how heavy it is, and if the Law of Correspondence says, “As Within, So Without”… You ask:
“I am to blame for my misfortunes and traumas? Is it really my fault because I have this trauma inside me?”
No… Blame is not the word.
Responsible? Yes.
How you received the trauma isn’t debated. You have it. The question Now is, what will you do about it? Will you stay angry? Will you succumb to it? Will you allow it to continue running the show?
It’s much easier to point to something outside ourselves and
say, “that’s the reason for my troubles and pain”, than it is to take Ownership
of our Energy and our innate ability to create our own lives.
Sit with that as you need too…. It's OK if this creates uncomfortable feelings. Allow yourself to feel them. (Reach out if you need support!)
As Adoptees, the pain and trauma we experienced early and perhaps on going in our childhood is not our “fault”. Yet now we are ADULTS.
As Adults, we are Responsible for how we choose to live our life, regardless of what happened in the past. We CAN break free of the Patterns that kept us safe in the FOG.
In the next Blog, I’ll talk about How we can use the Law of Correspondence to our benefit as Adoptees.
